CBCF Christians Breaking Chain Forwards Smash chain letters, don't bash God!

Teddy's Killer Mickey Mouse and Bloody Mary chain (You'll understand why I mention Teddy later on) has been floating around the net, scaring kids off Mickey Mouse, and annoying the heck out of other people who are not afraid of it and sick of seeing it clog up their email and the web while creeping out young people. It has been seen creeping out people on Yahoo Answers as recently as 2011.

It's high time this Mickey-slandering, child-abusive, cowardly bullying Bloody Mary hoax chain gets smashed to shreds.

Let's begin by highlighting an excellent smash of this chain on Youtube!

Then, an observant person on Yahoo Answers inquired about the names mentioned in mutations of this hoax.

Now, look out Teddy/Bloody Mary and in your wretched Mickey Mouse costume, here I go!

* * *

Chain: You Will Be Killed By Mickey Mouse

Miss Capri: Or Bloody Mary, either way, you are not only a monumental liar, but you stink at it. You can't even tell a convincing lie.

And dragging Mickey Mouse into this chain letter is utterly stupid on so many levels.

Mickey mouse is a beloved cartoon, not a killer. Get that through your thick head.

Chain: You are now cursed.

Miss Capri: Wrong, you are now getting ridiculed, and your stupid chain letter, smashed!

Chain: You mustsend this on or you will be killed.

Miss Capri: I suppose you believe Mars is actually made up of giant Mars Bars too. Please. You can't curse or kill me and everybody knows it…Or they should by now.

Chain: Tonight at 12:00am, by Mickey Mouse/Bloody Mary.

Miss Capri: … You know what? I've had Mickey Mouse items in my house since I was a kid, and none have ever killed me. And they're not going to now.

Let me tell you something about Mickey Mouse.

He's not a dealive chain freak. He's a cartoon created by Disney. He shows up in film, people sometimes dress up as him, he comes in the form of plastic, glass or other material moulds and figurines - and his cartoon voice is made by a man's falsetto.

Mickey Mouse is all that, but he's not a real live or spirit type entity that will come and kill anyone, especially over your stupid chain letter.

And if he actually did exist as flesh and blood, he would be upset at your slandering him that way and be within his right to sue you all the way into the depths of cartoon damnation.

As for Bloody Mary, she's just as fake. There was Queen Mary Tudor of England, who lived centuries ago, and there is a drink called Bloody Mary, but neither of those are going to kill anyone with a hoax.

Chain: This is no joke.

Miss Capri: actually, it is a joke, more specifically, an unfunny sick prank against vulnerable little kids. Are you proud of yourself as a chain originator, and child abuser?

Chain: So don't think you can quickly get out of it and delete it now because Mickey Mouse/Bloody Mary will come to you if you do not send this on.

Miss Capri: Who said anything about deleting it? I'll smash it and let it bleed out, broken and ridiculed on this site. As for Mickey Mouse "coming to me" if that was really true, he would've come a long time ago, to praise my bravery, intelligence and strength of character, the first time I didn't forward a stupid chain letter. So take that. Mickey Mouse would be welcome here. You, on the other hand, are not.

Chain: He/she will slit your throat and your wrists and pull your eyeballs out with a fork.

Miss Capri: Oh, so they are the great Forkmeister now? Please. As if I'd just sit there and let some silly little puppet or cotton candy-haired, cherry-eyed confection try that on me, as if he could, and Mickey is not Voldimort. He is not a cut-throat let alone a killer. Not even Voldy could carry out this silly little chain threat, because although his character was a murderous wind-bag, he too, like Mickey, is just a fictional character. In other words, get this: NOT REAL!

Chain: And then hang your dead corpse in your bedroom cupboard

Miss Capri: "Dead corpse" - um, doofus, whoever heard of a live corpse? In your attempt to sound scary, you just made yourself ridiculously redundant. The proper way to say it is "dead body."

And, YO, chain hoax originator, listen up. I don't have a "bedroom cupboard" I don't know what weird arrangement your tacky little shack might be, but in my house, the cupboards are in the kitchen, which is not in my bedroom! And Mickey Mouse can't and wouldn't do any of that stuff to me. Even if he was a murderous little for real creep, I'm much bigger than him and would make very short work of him in a hurry, and make a meal of him the next day.

Chain: or put you under your bed.

Miss Capri: Yeah right, and the sun rises in the west according to you I'm sure…Idiot.

Chain: What's your parents going to do when they find you dead?

Miss Capri: "What ARE" Not "What's your" And if that ever happened, it wouldn't be because I got killed by your stupid chain letter. Everyone's got to die eventually, and much as you hanker for it, you're not going to kill every little kid, or me or anyone else via bogus curse.

Chain: Won't be funny then, will it?

Miss Capri: Real deaths aren't funny, genius…But you're not going to bring any about with your Mickey-bashing, child-bullying, pants-on-fire chain. Your gloating while imagining somebody's parents finding them dead is definitely sick, and you deserve to be cursed.

Chain: Don't think this is a fake

Miss Capri: I don't THINK it is a fake… I KNOW it is a fake!

Chain: and it's all put on to scare you because your wrong, so very wrong.

Miss Capri: It is all put on by some sick pig who loves to frighten little kids, what a coward!

Chain: Want to hear of some of the sad, sad people who lost their lives or have been seriously hurt by this email?

Miss Capri: Oh, brother, more bogus tall tales about imaginary people in some sick chain originator's head. *YAWN*

This will spell trouble for you, because I have ideas that once I can get them all coming together, you'll get a surprise that you may not like. And I'm already suspecting who you are, or at least, what name I shall call you when it all falls into place.

Chain: CASE ONE -
Annalise Richmond :She got this email. Rubbish she thought. She deleted it. And now, Annalise dead.

Miss Capri: Only in your imagination. You don't really know, do you? *Wicked grin*

Chain: CASE TWO -
LouiseWhitefield: She sent this to only 4 people and when she woke up in the morning her wrists had deep lacerations on each. Luckily there was no pain felt, though she is scarred for life.

Miss Capri: Right, and fish fly… So how do you explain her sleeping through all that? Oh, right, you can't… And if you're going to write a name, you should put a space between the first and last.

Chain: CASE THREE -
Thomas Crowley: He sent this to 5 people. Big mistake.

Miss Capri: Yeah, big mistake, he ticked off 5 people and made himself look like an idiot.

Chain: The night Thomas was lying in his bed watching T.V. The clock shows '12:01am'.

Miss Capri: Curse-freak, you're a minute late…

Chain: The T.V misteriously flickered off and Thomas's bedroom lamp flashed on and off several times.

Miss Capri: Oh, just like the TV in the Teddy chain I suppose.

And you just confirmed my suspicion about your identity.

You are Teddy, one of Bloody Mary's pals or servants, or relations, heck, she could even be your servant for that matter, but you and she are connected. Though why you thought Bloody Mary and Mickey Mouse were so much alike that they could be interchangeable within one hoax is beyond me. But then, considering the source and how laughably ridiculous you are, well… Yeah, 'nuff said. Hahahaha!

And now you can add Annalise, Louise and Thomas to the small army of people you wished to die by your stupid chain letters and who thoroughly hate you.

Chain: It went pitch black, Thomas looked to the left of him and there he/she was, Mickey Mouse/Bloody Mary standing in white rags. Blood everywhere with a knife in his/her hand then disappeared. The biggest fright of Thomas's life.

Miss Capri: Obviously Thomas was dreaming…Of Bloody Mary dressed up in white rags with a pair of Mickey Mouse ears and a knife. Medications can make people dream the weirdest things.

Chain: Warning... NEVER look in a mirror and repeat -'Mickey Mouse.Mickey Mouse.' Mickey Mouse.../Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary…

Miss Capri: Besides the fact that I wouldn't do that anyway because it would make me look like a complete moron, chanting anything at a mirror can't otherwise do a thing to me or anyone else. Are you getting this, Bloody Mickey Mary Mouse Teddy?

Chain: I KILLED YOUR SON' Is it the end for you tonight! YOU ARE NOW CURSED

Miss Capri: Um, Teddy, how can I break this to you?

I don't have kids. I never had a son, so there's no way you could've killed someone who never existed.

you get first prize for being a hopeless, laughable, piffling idiot!

Hahahahahahahahaha!

Chain: We strongly advise you to send this email on.

Miss Capri: Of course you do, but it's actually being an obnoxious twit on your part, not any real advice. and no matter how much you beg, demand, order, and call it "strong advice" I'm smashing your chain.

Chain: It is seriously NO JOKE.

Miss Capri: It is seriously not cool bashing Mickey Mouse in order to scare little kids to get them bullied by your stupid joke chain. Yes, it is a joke, but seriously not funny except for the fact that you are terminally stupid, Teddy.

Chain: We don't want to see another life wasted.

Miss Capri: Then I suggest you get one of your own… Oh, wait, you can't, you're dealive.

Chain: ITS YOUR CHOICE...

Miss Capri: My choice, yes, to ridicule and obliterate this thing. And I'll point out that you, Mary Bloody Mickey Teddy Mouse, by your lying and bullying, have tried to make people feel like they don't have a choice, and then you go and call it a choice. You are a cowardly, child-abusing, control-freaking, brain-dead bully and you are asking to get hit in the eye with a fork and hung up in your own "bedroom cupboard."

Chain: WANNA DIE TONIGHT?

Miss Capri: If I was that badly off, I wouldn't be sitting here typing and smashing this chain, would I? So, Teddy, wanna keep getting pwned and laughed at?

Chain: If you send this email to... NO PEOPLE -

Miss Capri: I'll tell you what'll happen. I won't contribute to your child abuse racket and scare some young person, and, I won't look like a gullible jerk and annoy anyone past their childhood.

Chain: Your going to die.

Miss Capri: Eventually, like everyone does, your chain has no control over that.

Chain: 1-5 PEOPLE - Your going to either get hurt or get the biggest fright of your life.

Miss Capri: Well, that makes sense. Anyone stupid enough to send this chain to that many people is bound to tick at least a few of them off enough to want to toss the fool who sent it in a ditch.

Chain: 5-15 PEOPLE - You will bring your family bad luck and someone close to you will die.

Miss Capri: And how many pigs have you taught to sing lately? especially since you likely can't even sing. You can't even tell a tall tale right. Your stupidity doesn't know who my contacts are, can't track my email, and can't do a thing no matter how I treat this chain.

Chain: 15 -25 OR MORE PEOPLE - You are safe from Mickey Mouse

Miss Capri: That's implying that Mickey Mouse is a threat, and that is a big honking lie.

As you can see, this chain is not safe from getting smashed.

Shame on you for twisting Mickey Mouse in order to scare little kids!

And now, my little Bloody Mary henchman, er, make that henchmouse, you are so ended!